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Posts Tagged ‘Birthing from Within’

Hire a doula because, when all is said and done, she is the only one at your hospital birth (besides your family and friends) who answers to you as her final boss.

Your midwife, doctor, and nurse are probably wonderful and probably they want to help  you achieve the birth you want. But midwives, doctors, and nurses who work in hospitals have to answer to a lot more people than just you. They have to answer their colleagues. If they manage births in an unusual manner, and in today’s world, “unusual” may mean “more natural” just because of the statistical realities of interventions, their colleagues can exert subtle or not-so-subtle pressure to get back in line. And they have to answer hospital review boards and insurance companies. Insurance companies have a lot of impact on our medical institutions. Since obstetricians are the most-sued doctors in America, you can imagine that insurance companies care how they are practicing!

But doulas do not answer hospital review boards or insurance companies. They answer to mothers. Doulas are there for mothers. It is their entire job. One hundred percent. They do not have to spend time during your labor inputting lots of data into computers. They are focused on how you feel.

So it is definitely a good idea to make sure that your entire birth team is on board with your birth vision. It’s a great idea to make sure your care provider can handle whatever comes up (even if that means transferring your care. Transferring is still great care.). But it’s also helpful to hire someone who answers only to you. When you look in her eyes for reassurance in your decision-making process, you can be certain that she is reassuring YOU. She is helping you make the best decision for YOU.

Do you have any stories that exemplify this? I’d love to hear them!

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Reason #1: A doula can relieve your partner in a long labor. Sometimes the tasks required of a partner during a labor can be impossible without backup support from a doula. A labor that lasts through several mealtimes or all your normal sleeping hours can wipe out not only mom-to-be, but her support team, too. Doulas can allow partners to take 20-minute naps (or in really long labors, two or three hour naps) and visit the bathroom without being worried about leaving you alone. I once played back-up doula for a long labor in which the first-line doula AND the father needed relief. They had been supporting the mom-to-be for almost 36 hours straight and neither the doula nor the dad had slept for more than about 30 minutes. I came in the middle of the night for a four-hour relief stretch. I barely knew this couple, but I slipped into the dark room and quickly learned how to give back pressure the way this laboring mother needed. Her doula and partner went to the lounge to sleep. Mom and I worked together without saying much, just in the rhythm of labor. She was handling her contractions well; she was just exhausted. She, too, slept in between sensations. At dawn, the doula and father returned and I said good-bye. The doula and father agreed to take one-hour shifts after that so that they didn’t burn out. The baby was born, healthy and beautiful, about six hours later.

As a post script to this story, I ran into this woman two years later and found out that she had become a doula herself. She said she was so amazed at the support the two of us had given her and her husband that she wanted to give that gift to other families. She gushed about how incredulous she was that I had come in the middle of the night to offer relief to her support team. It was nice to hear, but it was also easy to say, “That’s what doulas do!”

BTW: here’s a link to a “10 Reasons To Hire a Doula” article by Ann Douglas. They are all good reasons. Excellent reasons. But I am going to try to write down the “other” reasons here in this series. The reasons that it’s GREAT to have a doula, but that most people don’t think about until after the fact (or, often, until it’s too late!): http://www.ohbabymagazine.com/prenatal/why-doulas-are-a-moms-best-friend/

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